Whirling snowflakes, driving snow. Walking through flurries of snow, I feel that my heart holds two worlds that seem cut off from each other.
Very turbulent, excited, rebelling, strong, powerful. Heavy snow flakes with space-consuming presence. Lost, falling, icy drops that cut their way, powerfully, free-falling. The heavy white blanket of silence, sheltering, covering.
Dancing, floating, light, airy, resting, enraptured, gentle and quiet. Pure wisdom. Crystals falling rhythmically, deliberately, aware of their destination. Silence, a muffling, protective coat, charting nuances, childlike, laughing, young and vulnerable.
One part of the inner landscape of my heart is turmoil, confusion, irritation, felt wetness and coldness, heaviness and a suffocating presence of jumbled themes and thoughts. A wild mix of emotions and words is groping its way with uncertain steps, it feels the cold draft of fresh snow. Defiant, plodding, staying upright against the wind, battling it, wanting to keep moving. Feeling one’s way through the snow, squinting, advancing without clear vision. My tracks behind me, churned up by the wind lightning-fast, visible only for a snowfall’s moment.
The other part of the inner landscape of my heart is a gasp of relief, acceptance of calm and stillness, a moment of holding still; expanding, strongly felt clarity and ease. A sorting and stringing together of words and thoughts. Being lost in reverie, centered, recharging, standing back. Inner warmth directed at myself. And suddenly new pathways for ideas emerge. The readiness to give up resistance grows easily and intuitively, the readiness to persevere and accept so that you arrive strengthened and knowing. Proceeding full of strength and trust, in defiance of flurries and drifts, with an expansive feeling in your heart. A first faint and finally joyful knowing that fresh snow on covered tracks signals a chance for new and different steps.
After constantly recurring snow flurries in my life I have learned more and more that both of these landscapes are part of me, that both belong to me and are inextricably linked with each other. A twoness that can be felt as a oneness. Each landscape is very present by itself and both sides make themselves heard – sometimes quietly, sometimes noisily. They live next-door to each other. Only coming and going together allows them to approach, learn about and finally accept the otherness of the other.
It is the polarity within my heart:
Light and shadow, lightness and heaviness, seeking and finding, freedom and confinement, beginning anew and holding back, strength and hesitation, calm and turbulence, noise and quiet.
Everything is possible but it can only become through togetherness and mindful care of the other part.
Are there snow flurries swirling within you? I am looking forward to hearing all about the snow flurries of your thoughts at firstname.lastname@example.org